My attorney told me that if I talk about the abuse, and if there are pictures and actual proof that would indicate that my children were abused, I would risk the court charging me for neglecting them--failing to protect them. But who was supposed to protect me?
I think this is about the most non-productive, absurd thing that the court can do--blame me? Obviously, if my children and I were all victims, I wasn't in any position to be able to protect them....but I did. I stood between my ex and them every chance I could. I handled him and manipulated every situation so that he would take his anger out on me. Most of the time it worked.
But now look at this, let's say there is no "hard core" evidence to show that he abused the children, and there IS enough medical evidence to prove what he did to me--the legal system now proceeds with saying what he did to me was isolated, and now that we are separated, those acts are not likely to occur, and thus have nothing to do with the children in their current state.
So now, we're back to square zero. Abuse is insignificant.
But what about the children as witnesses? Apparently that's not a concern of the legal system....And when my child begins to emulate my ex...I suppose that is going to be my fault all over again. Go figure.
Wednesday
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2 advocates for peace:
OK, this is totally disheartening, and makes me want to rethink everything I suggested about photographs. Up until now, I have not had personal contact with this dynamic of “failure-to-protect,” although I now recall hearing some of the girls and counselors at my local Shelter talking about it. (I still volunteer my time on a weekly basis.) To tell you the truth, I cannot even begin to figure this out. It is a supremely vicious circle. I have no idea what the answer might be.
I know the feeling about the system. We are to have faith in the system but how when they let us down. You just got to keep up the fight.
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