“Qualifying” as a Victim

By Mykayla Green

I always thought of myself as a victim of domestic violence, because I knew that by definition, I was. But as I talked to other victims, hearing their stories, or even being asked to tell mine, I began to question whether my experience really “qualified” me as a victim. I had been through years of verbal and emotional abuse, but only very brief physical abuse because I left right after the second incident. So because I hadn’t been beat up with black eyes, ended up in the hospital, or been physically abused for years, I felt that perhaps I wasn’t a “true” victim of domestic violence.

But after “checking myself,” I realized that it doesn’t matter how bad it was or how long it happened. If it happened, it happened. It’s nobody’s right to belittle or pass judgement about someone else’s experience, how that experience affected that person, or how long it should take for that person to “get over it.” We should all just support each other and recognize that we’ve all been through something, and that NOBODY should have to go through that type of experience.