Thursday

Do Children Benefit from Equal Custody?

Dear Reader,

You should first ask yourself what you mean by equal custody. If you mean that the children should spend 50% of their time with the mother and 50% of the time with the father, you should ask yourself yet another question:

What would it be like if you spent 1/2 of your time in one location, and half of your time at another location? Think of yourself in this scenario in full:
You would have your things at both locations, although, some of your favorite things, you will have to transport back and forth, or you will have to have two of them.

You will have to arrange your activities so that you can either participate in them from both locations, or only participate in them when you're at one location or the other.

You and your friends will have to have an understanding that you may not be able to associate physically during half of your time. Thus, if some event arises suddenly, it will be likely that you cannot participate.

Just to be fair, you shouldn't be able to have transportation to anything, you should have to rely on whatever exists wherever you currently are, meaning, you will be dependent upon the schedules of others.
And those are the basics.

How does that feel?

Wait a minute! Also remember, that none of this is of your own free will. In fact, you don't really have any say so in the whole ordeal. You are a reminiscent of a puppet.

Back to do children benefit--I'm sure that there are children who can benefit from the situation. I AM SURE OF IT. Why? Because I have done something that is so easy:

I have asked children. I have actually talked to them. And I'm not talking about Rachel Foundation style. I have listened to and understood their desires along with considering what is appropriate for their lives as individuals. Does anyone do this these days?

The funny thing about it is, if the situation doesn't work out, and the child is not happy, or not thriving, THINGS CAN BE CHANGED.

To apply a mask and say that "children" do benefit from equal custody is to render all children and all households the same.

What if I said,
White people would benefit from attending Historically Black Colleges and Universities.
Benefit in what ways? How? Why? Which White people? When?

It would appear that children would benefit from the same type of caretaking arrangement that existed in their intact households....whatever that arrangement was. And if they would not benefit from it then we must ask,
Why not?
What would should not be asking is, what parent has the potential to take care of the child the best.

Potential?

Again, why interrupt the pattern of the primary caregiving?

Who is really benefiting?



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